My Dirty Secret
by endlessly
Summary: Kirihara loves to mess with people, but one day he messes with the wrong guy. Unable to escape his torturer, Kirihara finds himself falling deeper and deeper. Warning: Yaoi, rape, violence and graphic sex. STORY COMPLETE
1. Chapter 1

I have been thinking of this story for some time now, but I didn't really want to write it.

I decided to get the story out of my mind, and thus this chapter was made. This story is **much** darker that any of my other stories.

**Warning: Yaoi, RAPE, violence and graphical sex. **I think that covers it...

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Prince of Tennis

**Beta: **May-Linn87

* * *

I smirked as I smashed the ball just inside the line, scoring another point.

"Game set and match, Kirihara. Game count 6-0".

'It's over already?' I thought disappointed, not even feeling tired.

I watched at my opponent and gave him the 'you-suck'-look. My opponent (some second year punk from who-knows what school) gave me the death stare. Like that scares me.

I walked over to the net and reached out my arm.

"Better luck next time, _loser_" I whispered as we shook hands.

I realized seconds later that I shouldn't have said that. He lifted his racket and smacked me in the temple.

I couldn't even react before the impact. The last thing I remember before everything went dark was the guy giving me a sadistic smile

"Don't think I'll let you go with just this…"

---------------------------------------------------

I slowly opened my eyes. The sharp light hurt my eyes, so I shut them fast and groaned.

"Hey, I think he's waking up" I heard someone say.

I decided to open my eyes to see where the voice was coming from.

The first think I remember was something red and something _extremely_ yellow.

I rubbed my eyes and tried looking again.

"Oh, Marui-senpai it's just you"

"Now what is that supposed to mean?" Marui asked indignantly.

My eyes had finally started focusing and I realised that the rest of the team was there too.

That reminds me…Where is this?

"Where are we?" I asked my senpai-tachi.

"We are in the hospital. You've got a serious concussion" Yagyuu kindly informed me.

"Yeah, you deserved it too, brat" Niou smirked at me.

I decided to ignore him. Mostly because my head hurt too much for me to come up with a reply.

"Wow, his head must be really messed up if he won't even say a 'che'" Niou mused.

"Stop your teasing" Sanada said strictly.

I was about to stick my tongue out at Niou, but the door opened and a man wearing a white coat entered.

"So you've finally awakened Kirihara-san. How are you feeling?" he asked with a kind smile.

"It feels like someone used my head as a tennis ball" I answered truthfully.

"Actually I guess you can say that someone _did _use his head as a tennis ball" Niou informed.

Bastard…

The doctor laughed softly. "Yes, I heard what happened" he took something from his pocked and bent over me.

"I'm just going to take a little check on you" ha said as he flashed my eyes.

I felt my head starting to hurt more as the sharp light scorched my eyes.

The pain made me nauseous, and I shoved the doctor away hard.

"Akaya, what are you-" Jackal was cut off as I bent over the side of my bed and emptied my stomach.

Marui leaped away from me as I hurled.

"Don't throw up on me" he yelled shocked.

"Oh God, please forgive me" I said sarcastically and sank down into the pillow.

"The concussion is more serious than I thought" the doctor muttered as he wrote something on a piece of paper.

"But he's going to be fine again, right?" Yanagi asked as he also wrote down weird things in his notebook.

"Yes, after all it is only a concussion, but still, concussions shouldn't be underestimated. I'll keep him over night for observation. You can go home if you want".

My teammates left the room and I closed my eyes.

Ahh…finally I can get some sleep.

Not before I thought that, someone shook my shoulder.

"I'm sorry, but no sleeping tonight Kirihara-san"

I glared dumbly at the doctor above me.

"Why not?"

"Because you're suffering from a severe concussion. Sleep could worsen everything. You can even end up in a coma and die, so no sleeping before we find out what's wrong with you.

"Thanks for the cheerful message" I said sarcastically.

The doctor laughed a little. "I'm not trying to scare you. I'm just telling you the truth so that you won't sue me if you fall asleep and everything worsens".

"You know, I'm not American" I said indignantly.

The doctor laughed again. "I've brought you some movies you can watch and some manga to read. I'll check in on you every 20 minutes to be sure that you won't fall asleep" with that the doctor left me alone.

I slumped down in the bed. I was bored already.

-----------------------------------------------

Two days later I was released from the hospital. Having only slept a few hours in three days had made me incredibly cranky. Well, that is only normal.

My mom picked me up, and when I finally arrived I dived in my bed and slept for twelve hours.

Oh, the satisfaction.

The next day I woke up early and went to school.

The doctors had permitted me to go to school, but I was not allowed to do anything straining, so no tennis practice for a week.

I bit my lip bitterly. This week was going to be a long and boring one.

Sanada had decided that I was to be present at morning and afternoon practice and watch.

Sometimes I think he likes to see me suffer.

The rest of the week was so boring that I seriously considered taking up knitting, just to pass the time. Of course I didn't really do that.

And as if my life wasn't bad enough right now, when I _finally _was allowed to attend practice again, Sanada refused me any hard training for another week.

Oh, the pain.

--------------------------------------------

Friday finally came. No more stupid school.

As I changed Marui came over to me.

"So, Kirihara. We're all going out today, and we wondered if you wanted to come with us?"

"But isn't this your only-third-years-allowed quality time?" I asked curiously.

Marui flinched at what I said. "You make it sound stupid"

I snickered. "My sincerest apologies" I joked and we both laughed.

"Well, we wanted you to come, but just this once" Marui said persuading.

"Sure I'll come. My mom is away on a business trip anyway"

Marui gave me an approving smile.

----------------------------------------

As Jackal had informed me, Niou was in charge of finding a place for us to hang out this week. So of course we ended up in a bar.

As Niou drank questionable liquids and chatting with some drunken ladies, I barely touched my drink. I don't really drink, but decided I'd at least have one glass before retreating.

I can't believe that Sanada actually allowed us all to drink. After all we're all minors.

When I asked him, he shot be a glare and mumbled something about not being our mother.

After a few hours of drinking and bullshitting I decided to call it the day and put on my jacket.

"Are you going already?" Marui pouted.

"Yeah, I'm really tired so I'll just go home. Thanks for inviting me, it was…interesting".

I walked fast out of the bar and started on the long way home.

It was late so the busses didn't go anymore.

I hurried a little, feeling scared with only the street lamps as light.

As I turned a corned I heard some noise in an alleyway before me. I stopped, but knew I had to walk by it to get to my house.

"Come on Akaya. You're just a few blocks from your house" I muttered to myself trying to relax.

I breathe in deeply and started to run. Just as I was about to pass the alleyway, something big came out and I smashed into it. I was sent flying backwards and hit the ground hard.

'I really hope I didn't get _another_ concussion' I thought fast, but my head didn't even hit the asphalt.

I slowly raised and tried looking at what I had bumped into. It was really dark so I didn't see anything.

The thing on the ground grunted and I realised it was a person.

"Ano, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to run into you. Are you ok?"

"Akihiko, what's taking you so long?" a voice said from the alleyway.

I started panicking again. Maybe I should run away. The guy on the ground didn't seem to be in pain, and his friends were there to help him if it was needed.

I had just decided to run when a hand gripped my shoulder and twirled me around forcefully.

And I looked right into the face of the person who had smacked me in the head with a racked.

"Well, if it isn't little mister tennis brain?" the guy smirked evilly.

Is it just me, or was that the lamest insult you've ever heard.

I decided I didn't want to stay here any longer and slapped his hand away from my shoulder.

"Well, if it isn't the big headed pussy face. I would've loved to stay and chat about your non-existing tennis skills, but I have something more important to do. Later" I said and walked away.

Moments later I found out why people say; never show your back to an enemy.

Something hard hit me in the left shoulder and the pain shot down my spine.

"Not so cocky now, are we?" the guy looked at me and hit me across the face.

I stumbled over the guy on the ground and fell down hard again.

"Wake up Akihiko" the second year nudged the guy on the ground groaned.

"What is it Sawada?"

Sawada looked at me with an almost crazy look in his face.

"We've gotten ourselves a new toy"

The guy on the ground, Akihiko, raised himself clumsily from the ground and eyed me with a weird glint in his eye.

Before I could do anything, he charged at me and kicked me in the stomach.

I gasped in pain and fell on the side, holding my stomach. I tried desperately to catch my breath when I felt a sharp pain in my back. Moments later another blow at my back made me wince in pain.

"Bastards" I huffed, barely being able to breathe.

A hand gripped my hair harshly and dragged me into the alley.

I screamed in pain, but was cut of when I was kicked in the face.

Everything went silent for a few seconds and I wondered if I lost my hearing. The dull pain made me nauseous again and soon after darkness took me.

----------------------------------------------------------

I opened my eyes, to find another unfamiliar ceiling. I could now focus again, and tried to sit up. Only to find out that I was cuffed to a bed.

When I saw this I started to panic. Horrible things were going through my mind.

Suddenly I felt a hand sliding up my stomach and lingered by my chest.

I shuddered with fear and disgust.

The guy known as Sawada was looking at me with lust in his eyes.

"Ever since that match I've wanted to violate you, and now I can finally do that"

His fingers gripped one of my nipples and pinched it hard.

I yelped and cringed in the bed, trying to get away.

"Don't even bother to try and escape. You'll stay here until I let you go" Sawada smirked and bent down to kiss me.

I wanted to puke and bit his lip in despite, but that only made him moan.

"I like it when they're resisting" he said and continued to kiss me.

He ripped open my shirt and started biting my collarbone.

All the time I tried not to make any sound. No way in Hell I'll give in to this bastard.

Sawada than bit down on one nipple, and I had to bite my tongue to prevent myself from crying out.

He then reached my pants, and started to take of my belt.

I felt my heart starting to beat faster. This is it…He is going to…

I felt tears sting in my eyes, but tried to blink them away. I wouldn't want the asshole to see me giving in for him. Never.

Sawada pulled off my pants and boxers, leaving me almost naked.

I tried to hide myself, but knew it didn't work.

"Please stop. Don't do it" my voice suddenly said. I felt a pang of fear when I actually realized what he was going to do. Call me slow, but I guess I didn't grasp the situation.

I thought he just wanted to fool around, trying to get revenge. But he was definitely going to do _it._

I wailed and pulled the handcuffs, but knew it was futile.

Sawada grabbed my knees and forced my legs apart.

"N-no…please" I begged as he placed himself between my legs. I could feel his bare erection against my thigh. I tried kicking him, and he smacked my face again.

He roughly swung my left leg over his shoulder, and I felt _something_ press against my hole.

I stared at him in fear and fell a tear falling down my chin.

"Please, stop it" I repeated many times, but he didn't hear. In one swift motion he pressed into me.

I screamed as the pain shot through my body. I felt tears flowing from my eyes, but I didn't try to hide them anymore.

Over me I faintly heard a groan. "Looks like you ripped. I guess this is your first time. You're so damn tight" he mumbled nonsense as he started thrusting in and out.

I started seeing white spots as he kept slamming into me.

I cried and screamed and even begged him to stop, but he didn't hear.

"Ah…no, please…it hurts" I cried until my voice became hoarse.

Sawada started speeding up and slammed hard into me as he came. His semen stinged as it entered my wounds.

He pulled out of me and laughed menacingly.

"That was so enjoyable, I almost want to do it again"

I felt fear rise in me again. I don't think I could stand going through that again.

"Please, no more. I'm begging you, no more" I whispered.

"You finally know your place, dog. Tell me, who is your master?"

"You" I answered bitterly

"Good boy. I will let you go…for now" he bent over me and uncuffed me, but I was so exhausted that I didn't even realise it.

Sawada bent down and whispered into my ear "If you tell anyone that I did it, you're going to regret it. I have contacts and will not hesitate to harm those close to you" with that he left me there, not being able to move. Everything hurt, but most of all else, I felt disgusted.

I slowly put my pants on and reached for my cell phone.

I knew I wouldn't be able to get anywhere without help, so I decided to call the one I trusted the most.

"Hello?" his voice sounded like heaven to me and I started crying violently.

"Yanagi, please help me".

* * *

So that was it (Hides from angry mob)

Please tell me what you think


	2. Chapter 2

So, I was lucky and didn't get any flames. I was sure that I would...

Then again, not many have reviewed. But that doesn't matter

Disclaimer: Prince of Tennis is not mine, but Sawada is. Not that _that_ is something to be proud of.

Yes I have also realized that Sawada reminds of Sanada. Also Ive just watched Gokusen, and there was a nice Sawada there...

Beta: May-Linn87

**Warning: Rape, violence, ooc, yaoi and sex. Also there's a lot of crying. well, a lot as in a lot considering that** **it's the Rikkaidai regulars.**

Enjoy

* * *

I looked up at the now familiar ceiling. I was lying in the same hospital as I had a few weeks ago.

I looked beside me, and noticed that Yanagi wasn't there.

'He is probably getting something to eat or drink' I thought. After all he had been sitting beside me ever since he brought me to the hospital.

I sighed and tried not thinking about what had happened, but I found it hard to forget Yanagi's scared face.

_Flashback_

"_Please help me" I sobbed into the phone._

"_Akaya? What's wrong?" Yanagi's voice asked, sounding alarmed._

"_I...I have been..." __I have been raped._

_The words were difficult to get out. I couldn't say it._

"_Where are you?"_

"_I think I'm in a warehouse" I tried to gather myself and look around for clues._

_I suddenly discovered a window and looked outside. _

"_I'm in the warehouse beside the Catholic Church"_

_There was only one Catholic Church in this city_

"_I'll be there right away" Yanagi said and hung up._

_Please hurry. I don't want to be here any longer._

_For what seemed like hours later, Yanagi stormed through the doors._

_The relief I felt when I saw him was indescribable._

_Yanagi looked with me with absolute shock written all over his face._

"_Akaya…What happened?" Yanagi asked, though I'm pretty sure he knew._

_I started crying again, and hid my face from him._

"_Don't look" I yelled in-between sobs._

_Yanagi didn't say anything, but pulled me into a tight hug. I clinged to him and cried loudly for a long time. _

"_I'm here for you. Relax, I'm here now" Yanagi muttered sweet nothings into my ear to make me calm down. When I did, he called a taxi and took me to the hospital._

_End flashback_

And that's how I ended up here. Again.

I heard a knock on the door. "Come in"

The doctor who had treated my concussion entered.

"How are you feeling?" he asked with a soft voice.

"Fine" I muttered uninterested. Just fine.

"I'm sorry. I know that's a stupid question" he said knowingly. "I have treated many patients like you-"

"Please don't pity me" I snapped at him "I just want to forget about it".

The doctor nodded. "That is understandable, but you have to tell the police officers everything when they come".

"I'm gonna be interrogated?" I asked boredly

"Yes, they will ask you questions about what happened yesterday night. I know it'll be difficult to talk about, but you have to do it".

I didn't answer him.

"Ah..And my name is Shigure Hayato. I've realized that I've forgotten to tell you"

"OK" I answered uninterested.

"By the way, your friends are here. They are currently standing outside, talking with the guy who brought you here. Shall I let them in?"

I felt my stomach cringe. I didn't want to see them right now. I was embarrassed.

"I don't want to see them right now".

"Then I shall send them away" he said and walked to the door.

"Wait" I said fast "Tell Yanagi to come in"

The doctor didn't ask questions and walked out.

A few moments later Yanagi entered. I don't know why it was ok for him to see me like this. I'm not sure about what kind of relationship we have, but I guess I consider him my closest friend.

"How are you feeling Akaya?" I winced as the same retarded question was asked, but didn't snap at Yanagi.

"I'm tired" I answered truthfully.

"The sleep for a while. I'll stay here as long as you want to".

I gave him a short, but honest smile.

"I wish I could, but I'm…I'm afraid" I whispered and didn't look at Yanagi. I don't want him to think of me as a crybaby, but I was afraid.

"What are you afraid of?"

"Nightmares…"

Yanagi didn't say anything for awhile.

"Why didn't you want the others to come?" he asked

I bit my lip thoughtfully.

"I guess I didn't want everyone to stare at me with pitiful eyes".

"I understand".

"How did they act?"

Yanagi snickered a little.

"Well, Marui and Niou protested. Demanded that the doctor let them in. Jackal and Yagyuu tried to calm them down while Genichirou just stood there. They will come back tomorrow".

My eyes widened. I don't want to see them yet, feel their eyes looking at me like I was a freak.

"I don't think they will accept a no next time"

"But I don't want them to look at me like I was some freak. I can see it all in my head" I shouted at Yanagi. "Nobody will know what to say and we'll all just sit in silence. As I don't feel bad enough as it is" I felt tears gather in my eyes and I cursed loudly.

I'm not some stupid girl.

Again I felt Yanagi wrap his hands around my shoulders. I relaxed and blinked away the tears.

"I understand why you feel that way, but you're not being fair to the others. They are worried too, and they want to be there for you. Don't push them away, Akaya"

I knew he was right. Damn it, he was _always_ right.

----------------------------------------------------

I must have fallen asleep, because when I opened my eyes, it was dark outside.

Yanagi wasn't beside me. I guess he went home. It was after visiting hours, after all.

I suddenly felt a little pang of fear and turned on the light. I had my own room, so I wasn't bothered by strangers.

I looked outside the window. Beside it stood a large tree. Its branches almost touched the window, like it wanted to come and take me any minute.

I laughed at my thoughts, and turned off the lights again. And almost screamed.

On the street right outside the window, stood a person looking right at me.

A person I would never forget. _Could_ never forget.

He smirked when he realized that I saw him. Just how long had he been standing there?

I closed my eyes and tried to relax. He can't harm me here. He won't come here I kept telling myself.

I slowly opened my eyes, afraid of what I might see.

But he wasn't there anymore.

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Shigure-san opened the door and looked at me.

"Did you get any sleep tonight?"

Not at all

"Yes, a little" I lied

I don't think he believed me. After all, I had dark rings around my eyes.

"I've heard that your friends will come back again today" he said

"Yes"

"They weren't too happy when I told them you wouldn't see them yesterday"

"I know. Yanagi told me"

Shigure-san smiled at me. He always smiles, doesn't he?

"I'm just going to ask you a few questions before they come" he sat down on a chair beside my bed.

"We have informed your mother. She's taking the first flight she can book. Also I wanted to inform you that you are entitled to a head shrink psychologist if you want to talk to someone. I highly recommend that you accept that offer. Now, it is decided that you are to attend at least two meetings with Yamato-san. He will question you about what happened that night.

If you feel like his sessions are helping, then you can arrange to meet him once a week".

I just nodded when he finished. Like I want to wail about my feelings to a stranger.

Shigure told me to think about it and left.

I sat in deep thought when someone knocked on the door.

"Come in" I said when the door didn't open.

"Hallo" Yanagi said as he entered. "We are all here now. Will you let them in?"

I nodded.

Yanagi waved for the others to come, and soon after they all stood around his hospital bed.

Great. Just as I thought it would be.

"Stupid brat" Niou suddenly yelled and smacked me behind my head. It wasn't hard or anything, but I was rather surprised.

"Like we'd blame you for what happened" Niou's voice was a little softer now.

I looked ashamed at the others. They looked at me with the same expression in their face.

I relaxed when I realized that the expression was not pity.

"Sorry" I muttered almost inaudibly.

Suddenly Marui hugged me tightly; "It's my entire fault. If I hadn't asked you out that day this would've never happened".

I tried to push him away as he, _rather rudely, _tried to invade my personal space. "Don't be stupid. I don't blame you. Not anyone of you".

Marui sniffed and pulled away. He looked at me and smiled.

"So…how are you feeling?"

What _is it_ with that question?

"Never been better" I joked and we both laughed.

I heard a relieved sigh and turned to the other regulars.

"I'm glad you're fine Akaya" Sanada said and smiled briefly.

"And I am to send a message from Yukimura. He would have come too, but he is not allowed to leave his hospital room."

I nodded. "What is the message?"

"I am here for you" Sanada said. "And so are we" he added.

Every one of my teammates smiled at me, promising protection and help.

I felt tears brimming in my eyes again, but didn't try to suppress them this time. I let them fall as I cried silently, all the time thanking them.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

After much crying, on my behalf, and comforting/hitting, on Jackal and Niou's behalf, they left.

Visiting hours were almost over when I heard a knock on the door and Shigure-san entered.

"We have one more visitor if you're up to it"

"Sure" I replied "Who is it?"

"He says he is your brother. I'll let him in now" Shigure-san said before leaving.

I was confused. I don't have a brother.

The door opened again and a tall dark man entered.

I froze. Sawada.

Sawada closed the door behind him and locked it. He walked over to my bed and bent over me.

"You've been a good pet" he said smiling and stroking my cheek.

I slapped his hand away and glared daggers at him

He stared angrily back and lifted his hand to hit, but stopped in mid air.

"I guess I can't harm you, when you are in the hospital" he said and pouted slightly.

I was so scared that I could barely move, but I would _never_ let him know that.

Sawada bent down and licked my lips. I jolted back and tried to hit him, but he held my hands in a vice grip. He pressed our lips together and forced my mouth apart.

I felt like throwing up ad he stuck his tongue into my mouth. It felt like a wet eel was swimming inside my mouth.

Sawada pulled away and panted a little.

"You taste good" he said before he dived into another kiss.

There was nothing I could do but to let him carry on. He was practically lying over my upper body and I couldn't free my hands.

'Relax, he won't do anything as long as we're in the hospital' I thought to calm myself.

Sawada let go of my lips again and I spit him in the face. This time he did slap me across the face.

"You feisty little whore" he sneered at me "I will tame you" he said as he slapped me again.

My head felt strangely heavy and I had to focus not to wince.

"You think I'll ever let you go?" Sawada whispered into my ear.

He laughed loudly and got walked over to the door. "Be sure to visit me when you're free to leave" he said with a suggestion smile.

He unlocked the door and left. I stormed from my bed and locked the door. I then ran over to the window and made sure it was locked before pulling for the curtains.

I leaned against the wall and slumped down on the floor. I pulled up my knees and hid my face.

When is this nightmare going to stop?

* * *

Nightmares in broad daylight...O.o

I'm currently sick. I have no idea of what's wrong, but my stomach is acting weird, I have pain shots through my body and I'm tired.

Only your reviews can help me get better


	3. Chapter 3

I haven't uploaded before because I have been sick. I was actually hospitalized O.o

But it wasn't anything serious...but still. A fine way of skipping school.

**Warnings: **Rape, violence, bondage, angst, yaoi...think that covers it.  
Ah!!!! And I also promise that this is the last time Kirihara cries...Or at least for a while.

Disclaimer: Prince of Tennis is not mine is. Sawada is, but we don't like to speak about him...

Please enjoy

* * *

I gave the two policemen my best death glare. Unfortunately it didn't work.

"Would you please tell us what happened that night?" one asked.

"I was raped"

"Yes, we know that, but could you tell us the details?"

My eyebrows twitched "_What?_" I choked out.

The policeman blushed furiously when he realized what he had said.

"Ah! Th-that wa-wasn't what I-I meant to.. say!"

"Perv!" I pointed accusingly at the beet red policeman.

The other one sighed. "I'll ask the questions"

"Can you give us the details of what happened that night, before the incident?"

The incident? That's also a way of putting it.

"I was out with some guys from my school. I left earlier because I was tired. I went home and accidentally ran into someone. We were both knocked over. The guy was a friend of-"

I stopped suddenly, realizing that I had almost revealed his name. Sawada.

"A friend of whom?" the policeman asked sitting up straighter.

"The guy who raped me" I said quietly.

The policeman nodded and wrote down something on a notebook.

"How did they look like?" he asked

"Don't know"

He stared at me disbelievingly.

"We know for sure that the lights were on in the warehouse. You must have seen his face"

"Who told you that the light was on?"

"The boy who found you, Yanagi, told us everything. He also told us that the light was on, and judging on your body's state, you were in no condition to turn it on yourself."

Stupid cops.

"Well, I _didn't _see his face" I crossed my arms stubbornly.

"Listen" the cop leaned closer. "You don't have to be afraid. Did he threaten you? You don't have to be scared; we'll catch him for sure".

I sniffed softly. "But he has contacts"

The policeman nodded understanding. "He threatened your family? Friends?"

I nodded

"I understand that you don't want to put anyone in danger, but he might hurt others. Please tell us what he looked like"

I wanted to tell them. Really, but my courage vanished when I recalled last night.

"I don't know" I said not looking at them.

The policeman sighed again.

"I understand. Please tell us if you remember anything else" he said and they both left.

I lay down in my bed and pulled the covers over my head.

Soon after I was asleep.

----

Yanagi PoV

I was sitting with the other regulars when the two policemen came out of his room.

"Did you get any clues?" I asked curiously

"Not one" one of them answered

"What?" Marui and Niou said at the same time

"I believe that he is afraid to tell us anything. I came to the understanding that the rapist threatened Kirihara-kun that if he told anything, Kirihara-kun's friends and family would be hurt."

I gasped slightly at this.

'I should have known this' I scolded myself.

"So what are you going to do now?" Yagyuu asked

"Unfortunately, there is nothing we can do. Without a description we can't find him. And I doubt that Kirihara-kun will report him, so he's a free man".

"That's bullshit. He has _raped _someone" Niou yelled.

"I am well aware of that, but there is nothing we can do if Kirihara-kun doesn't report it" came the aggravated answer.

Niou slumped against a wall in defeat.

The policemen left, but we didn't go into Akaya's room.

Everyone was a bit shocked and angry.

"That idiot" Niou suddenly yelled and stormed into Akaya's room.

"Wait" I shouted, but he ignored it.

----

Kirihara PoV

I woke with a start when the door to my room slammed open.

I looked around confused.

'Where's the canons?' I thought dumbly.

I looked towards the door, and recognized Niou standing there. He looked mighty pissed.

"Niou-senpai, what's wro-"

I didn't get to finish. Niou stormed towards me and grabbed my pyjama collar.

"You idiot! Why would you cover for an asshole like that?" he yelled in my face.

I understood right away what he was talking about.

I let my eyes drop, unable to look him in the eyes.

"I'm sorry" I whispered pathetically.

Before Niou could say anymore, the others came in and wrenched him off me.

"Calm down Niou" Sanada yelled at him, and Niou pulled back a little. But his face still looked at me with anger.

"I agree though" I heard Marui say.

I looked at him questioningly. "What do you mean?"

He walked towards me and bumped me lightly on the head.

"Don't you think we can take care of ourselves?" he asked

I stuck out my tongue. "Why would you think I'm protecting _you _guys?"

Marui laughed loudly. "Who else Kirihara? Your group of friends is

small, remember"

"Pardon me for not being popular" I sneered at him. We both looked at each other and started laughing.

"No, seriously" Marui became serious again. "You don't have to protect us".

I bit my lip hard. Why won't they understand?

"But what if something happen? He has friends. Tough friends." I sniffed

"What if he does the same to one of you? I couldn't live with that".

Nobody said anything for awhile.

I felt a hand on my shoulder and looked up, finding Sanada towering over me.

I gulped, feeling somewhat afraid.

"I swear to God I would have hit you, if you weren't lying in a hospital bed" he roared.

I whimpered and looked Yanagi. I gave him my save-me-from-the-ogre look, but Yanagi just sat there.

Betrayer. Judas. I stuck my tongue out at him

"Can't you take this a little more serious?" Niou shouted at me.

I felt anger rise and stormed out of bed. I ran over to Niou and hit him the hardest I have ever hit anyone.

Niou tumbled to the floor and looked at me disbelievingly.

"Why?" I found myself yelling. "Why does everything have to be so god damn serious all the time? Can't you just accept what I'm saying and leave it. I'm trying to forget what happened, but all everyone wants is to reopen the wound and pour salt into it" I gasped and looked at my _friends_. They all had shock and sorrow written all over their faces.

I felt the anger rise again.

"JUST STOP IT" I yelled as loud as I could. I took the glass of water that stood by the window and threw it against the wall.

The next thing I knew, Yanagi had stormed over to me and tightly gripped my hands.

"Calm down, Akaya" he said with a strained voice.

I struggled to get my hands free, but Yanagi was much stronger than me.

"Why? Why must you look at me like I was some kind of freak?" I yelled at the others who just stood there, looking stupid.

I kicked Yanagi in the shin, but he still held my arms.

"We don't think of you as a freak" Yanagi said. I looked up and saw his eyes filled with emotions. I relaxed then, because I have never seen his eyes like that before.

I felt tears flowing down my face.

'Shit. Stupid tears' I yelled at myself, but I still burrowed my face is Yanagi's chest and cried like a child.bYanagi let go of my hands and embraced me tightly. We stood like that until my face and throat hurt. I sniffed and pulled away from Yanagi.

"Are you alright now?" he asked gently.

I nodded and turned to look at the others.

Marui was looking at me with a tear stricken face and Jackal had a comforting arm around his shoulders. Sanada had drawn his caps down so I couldn't see his face and Niou and Yagyuu looked at me with slightly painfilled eyes. slightly.

'It's all because of me' I thought. 'I'm causing them all this trouble'.

It's all my fault.

I slowly bent my head as low as my pride allowed it.

"Sorry" I said sincerely.

"S' alright" Niou muttered back.

I smiled for the first time in a long while.

"Awww! Niou's being all mushy" I teased and got my expected reaction

"Stupid brat" Niou spat and ran after me, as I limped behind Jackal, both of us ignoring fukubuchou's yelling.

Yanagi lightly brushed away the hair from his face.

"Yare yare".

* * *

Just for information: yare yare basically means jeez..or geez. I'm not sure how you write it in English.

Reviews is always fun to get, so please do that


	4. Chapter 4

Another chapter and it's summer on top of that...Ah, life is just perfect right now.

Except I probably won't get into the same school next year. We have to search to get in every year, and my grades are not so good right now...sigh.

Disclaimer: I do not own Prince of Tennis. I do, however, own Sawada, but we're thinking of disowning him.

Warning: Slight angst

Enjoy

* * *

Pong….Pong

I hit the ball against the wall again and again

Pong…Pong

It's been a week since I got discharged from the hospital, but I'm not allowed to do any hard training yet, so I find myself hitting the tennis ball against the wall often.

It's very boring.

Sigh…

I finally gave up believing that if I hit the ball hard enough, it would explode, and went to the changing room.

"Hey, brat. How's the first year practice doing?" Niou laughed as I entered.

"Very funny, Niou-senpai" I sneered back and started to change.

"By the way, Akaya, we're visiting Yukimura today. You'll come, right?" Jackal said.

It wasn't really a question though. We all knew that Yukimura had wanted to talk to me about what had happened.

I had avoided visiting him for some time, but I didn't have any more excuses.

"Sure I'll come"

----

The hospital was scary and…white. I know it sounds lame, but I don't have any good hospital memories. Is it actually possible to have good hospital memories?

Being scared of a hospital. I've really sunk low. It's not even the hospital that I was in.

Anyways, as we reached out destination I felt somewhat tired.

Not tired tires, but tired as in; this is bothersome. Am I making any sense?

Sanada knocked on the door and Yukimura's voice told us to enter.

We did and soon after all the regulars stood cramped in the little room.

"My, you all came. I'm honoured" Yukimura smiled.

"How are you feeling" Yanagi asked

"Just fine. And you? Are you all practising for the Kantou tournament?"

"Everything is fine, but it will be a minor setback since you're not with us" Sanada informed

Yukimura smiled solemnly when he heard that.

"You're so sweet" he teased and Sanada discreetly pulled down his cap.

His face suddenly became serious and he turned towards me

Here we go…

"Akaya, how are you feeling?" he asked with concern written all over his face

I gave him a quick smile "I'm just fine. But I'm not allowed to practice, so I'm not sure about the Kantou tournament. Well, I guess I just have to trust these fools" I said with an evil grin.

"Brat" I heard Marui mutter behind me.

That made me smile even more.

"Could I talk a little with Akaya alone?" Yukimura asked

The others murmured a 'yes' and left.

Yukimura patted his hand on the side of his bed, telling e to sit down.

I hesitantly did that.

"Are you sure you're ok?" he asked again.

I smiled reassuringly. "I'm fine. Really".

"I'm sorry I wasn't there, but I'm not allowed to leave the hospital".

I sighed heavily. "I knew you were going to say that. I'm over it, truly"

Yukimura smiled relieved.

"You were always the survivor" he joked.

"Haha, very funny" I said sarcastically, but laughed nonetheless.

----

"Shakespeare was one of England's greatest poet and playwright-"

I yawned loudly and stretched.

Literature

Boring

I don't see the point in learning about ancient dead people.

"Kirihara-kun. Since you seem so fascinated about this lecture, why don't you read a little for us?" the teacher, Ohni-san, smiled cruelly at me.

I sighed and rose from the seat.

"Page 209, paragraph three" Ohni-san informed me.

I opened my mouth to read, but something caught my attention.

I looked outside the window and saw a familiar figure standing by the school gate.

Sawada.

My mouth went instantly dry.

"Kirihara-kun, is something wrong?" Ohni-san asked worriedly.

I slammed the book on my desk and ran out of the classroom.

I don't believe it. Why is he here?

As I ran out on the courtyard I saw that he was talking to someone.

Marui.

I felt panic rise and spurted over to the school gate.

"What are you doing here?" I asked Sawada

Marui looked at me questioningly.

"You know him?"

I ignored his question and continued glaring daggers at Sawada.

"I thought that I'd stop by to see your school. After all, you tell me nothing about yourself".

He smiled and draped an arm around my waist.

"We're lovers after all" he said and pulled me closer

"Play along, or face the consequences" he whispered harshly to me.

I looked at Marui, who looked shocked at me

"H-he is your boyfriend?" he stuttered weakly

I winced when I saw his reaction

"Akaya, you haven't told anyone about me?" Sawada faked a sad voice "I feel so unimportant…or perhaps" he turned to look at Marui.

"Perhaps you were afraid that your friends wouldn't accept it".

"N-no, I don't have a problem, don't misunderstand" Marui quickly said

"Good. I wouldn't want Akaya crying because is friends don't accept that he's with a guy"

I felt sick, listening to what he was saying. I clenched my hands and tried to think of something else.

_Play along, or face the consequences. _

The words echoed through my brain again and again.

I was scared. I was scared of what he would do, so I kept quiet like a coward.

"I don't mind that he's seeing a guy…I just didn't know that he was seeing someone…" he laughed awkwardly.

"You should've said something Akaya" he said and smiled. But he wasn't looking at me.

"Sorry" I forced myself to say

"Um…well, I have to go now. See you later" he disappeared so quickly that I didn't get a chance to respond.

"Aha, I think he likes you" Sawada teased.

"Don't be a fool. He's not as twisted as you are"

Sawada faked a surprised face

"Don't tell me…You're a homophobe?"

I harshly pushed him away, and looked at him, eyes full of hate.

"I haven't actually had any good experience when it comes to homosexual relationships" I spat out.

Sawada started laughing loudly and pulled me close again.

"That's what I like about you" he smiled creepily as I struggled to get free. "You're so feisty. Makes me hot"

I froze when I heard the last part.

"No" I weakly whispered as he licked my ear.

"You don't like showing off in public?" he teased. "I'll guess I have to take you somewhere private then".

He grabbed my arm and dragged me down the street.

I don't know why I didn't try to run away. Somehow it felt like he had this control over me, and I could do nothing but obey him.

I felt my stomach turn.

Am I really this weak?

I bit my lip and yanked my hand from his grip.

"I won't listen to what you say" I yelled at him.

Sawada only laughed mockingly.

"That redhead was rather cute" he said as he pressed me into a fence

"I wonder what kind of face he'd make if I thrust into him".

"DON'T YOU DARE" I almost shrieked at him. I pushed him away and hit him across the face.

"Little bitch" Sawada grumbled angrily.

"If you touch him, I'll report you to the police" I said triumphantly.

He smiled evilly then. "Do you know why my name sounds familiar?"

Huh? Has he gone mad?

I blinked stupidly at him.

"You might have heard of Sawada Corporation. My family owns a lot of businesses. Even some hospitals".

"I don't follow" I said indifferently.

"Really? Then you're not as smart as I thought you were".

I started to feel uneasy. Sawada seemed so sure about himself.

Something was not right.

"I heard that your captain has some decease and is currently awaiting surgery".

My eyes widened when realization hit me.

"You wouldn't…"

"I heard that he is quite the looker. And I like them weak and powerless"

My chest tightened painfully. He wouldn't…couldn't.

"You're despicable. But I don't believe you"

He must've been joking. Rich boys don't go around raping others. It would surely put the family business in danger.

"I call your bluff" I yelled and ran away.

No more, I can't take much more.

I ran all the way home and collapsed in my bed.

----

The next day I was finally allowed to practice with the other regulars.

"You have missed almost two weeks of practice so I expect you to not slack off during morning practice" Sanada told me with his usual dull voice.

I yawned openly and smacked my face.

I hadn't gotten much sleep last night, as a certain someone kept harassing my thoughts.

'Don't think about it' I told myself.

"Marui, do you want to warm up together?" I asked my senpai.

He looked at me and quickly diverted his eyes to somewhere else.

"Sorry, but I'm going to run for warm-up" he said absentmindedly and walked off.

"Hmm…I wonder if something's wrong with Marui" I heard someone say behind me.

I turned and saw Niou, Yagyuu and Yanagi sand there.

"What do you mean?" I asked curiously.

"Well, he's been acting strange since yesterday. Maybe something happened"

"Yesterday…?" Oh...Realization hit me.

"You know something, Akaya?" Yanagi asked me

"No" I said fast. "Nothing at all"

I turned away from the group. Sawada couldn't be right could he?

----

The day seemed boring, like usual. Nothing exciting, nothing new.

I slept through English as usual and got extra homework as usual.

My P.E teacher yelled at me for being tardy and my homeroom teacher threw me out of the classroom for being rude.

I wasn't rude, I was honest. Everyone should know that red and pink do not match.

Anyway, his seemed to be a usual boring and uneventful day.

Until afternoon practice.

Sanada stormed into the changing room

"Something's happened" he said with a worried voice

"What?" everyone said together.

"Someone broke into Yukimura's room tonight. I just got a call"

Everyone was shocked

"Who was it?" Jackal asked

"They don't know, but it was three men. Luckily a nurse interrupted them before they could do anything"

I felt my chest tighten. It couldn't be…

* * *

Cliffie...

So, what'd you think? Good? bad? please review, but no pointless flames.

Btw, does anyone know what kind of sound a bouncing tennis ball make? I made it pong, but it _must_ exist a better word.


	5. Read This!

**Authors note**

**  
I've gotten some requests about pairings, and thought I should have a vote.**

**The 'chosen' -hehe- ones are:**

**SanadaxKirihara**

**NiouxKirihara**

**KiriharaxMarui**

**And of course...No pairing.**

**So I hope you'll vote, because if you don't I'm just gonna write some random weird things and ruin the story**

**(nobody cares...sigh)**

**-endlessly-**


	6. Chapter 5

The clock is now 01:48 and I'm tired(Or do you say the time is??? It sounds more logic. The time is 02:08 now). Still I wanted to update my story to all of you silly heads who's still awake. **Go to bed!!! **(After you have read this story, of course)

Concerning the pairing votes; here are the results so far:

**KiriharaxMarui - 7**

**SanadaxKirihara - 6 **(Currently listening to music from **Tenimyu**. "Challenge") Love the beginning of that song. **Agree?  
**

**NiouxKirihara - 3**

You can continue to vote until this Friday 06.07. Votes after 24.00 (my time, cause I'm evil) will not be counted.

Now that that's settled, let's continue.

**Warning:** Angst, tears, mature content and rape.

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Prince of Tennis. I do however own Sawada. I created him by throwing everything I hate into a lump of mud. I feel like God. Scratch that last part; I AM GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**Disclaimer2:** I do not know nor do I have any claim or relation to God. I am also the furthest from being God as possible.

**Beta:** May-Linn87. She complained about my grammar. Writing then instead of than. Well, forgive me, but it's frickin' hard to write on a laptop. **All** the blame for this story's grammar faults will go to my beta. Maybe I should get another one. runs from one pissed off beta-writer

Sorry, I won't waste anymore of your time. Enjoy!

* * *

I shivered as I felt something wet trail down my ear. 

Sawada chuckled at my reaction and continued, now licking my throat.

"I've wanted to do this to you for a while now" he breathed huskily.

He suddenly pulled harshly at my shirt and a ripping sound told me that it had ripped.

"No" I whimpered in disgust as Sawada bit down on my nipple.

"No?" he asked evilly. "I thought I had explained to you what happened when you defy me"

'You did more than just explain' I thought bitterly.

I wanted to shout it at him, but held my tongue.

I knew that if I struggled he'd become violent and I still remember the pain from last time.

So I just closed my eyes and let him continue.

----

"Games set and match won by Niou-san. Game count; 6 games to 3"

I cursed under my breath when the second year loudly announced my loss.

"I must say, it wasn't exactly a difficult match..." I heard Niou boast to Yagyuu, just loud enough for me to hear it.

"Stupid pigtail head" I spat in his direction.

"Akaya" I heard a deep voice say behind me.

I breathed in and turned around. And felt something hit my left cheek with such a force that threw me to the ground.

Sanada.

I lay on the ground and looked up at him.

"Losing is not accepted here at Rikkaidai, not even practice games," his voice thundered over me.

I decided to not care and closed my eyes.

My head hurt and I felt my cheek start to swell.

I opened my eyes and saw Sanada still standing over me.

I realized that he had continued to speak and was now angry because I hadn't paid attention.

"Akaya, listen to me when I speak to you-" he began but stopped when I stood up from the ground.

"Sorry" I told him, sarcasm nearly dripping from my voice "I don't listen to bullshit".

I heard the others around me gasp, but paid then no attention.

"I'll be leaving early today" I told a shocked Sanada and left the courts.

----

It was difficult to not fall asleep in class.

I hadn't exactly gotten much sleep lately.

I gently touched my cheek and cursed. Damn Sanada for putting another bruise on me.

Like I didn't get enough of them yesterday.

The thought of yesterday made me shiver with fear and disgust.

After hearing about the break-in in Yukimura's hospital room, I immediately started looking for Sawada.

Not knowing where to find him, I had roamed the streets for almost two days until I found some clues.

I had showed up at his apartment and he was, needles to say, surprised.

"My, my, if it isn't my little lost kitten" he had laughed at me.

Just seeing him had made me weak and scared.

"You heard about Yukimura right?" he stated more than asked.

Feeling my courage leave me I had only nodded.

"Become mine and I will leave him and that redhead alone" he whispered into my ear and pulled me inside.

I sighed and tried to forget everything. I looked at the blackboard and felt like laughing.

What is the point in this anyway?

Living in a world where it is so much pain, and no pleasure?

The laughter kept bubbling up my throat and I couldn't silence it anymore.

"Kirihara-kun?" the teacher looked questioningly at me when I burst out laughing.

"Kirihara-kun, would you mind telling me what's so funny?" she asked strictly.

"Everything" I said between laughing.

"Everything?" the teacher asked.

My classmates looked all looked at me, some with worry in their eyes and others with annoyance.

It all made me laugh louder, seeing those stupid people looking at me.

I continued to laugh loud when I felt another urge fill me.

The urge to cry.

Why was I laughing anyway? The reason people laugh is to forget the hardness of their lives, but what if you don't deserve it?

I kept thinking about my useless life when I felt tears forming in my eyes and started to trail down my cheeks.

"Kirihara" I heard the teacher gasp, but I couldn't see anything.

I started to panic as my sight faded, and soon I was alone in the darkness.

----

A sudden light made me blink.

I looked confused around me, not knowing where I was.

"Akaya" I heard and turned towards the voice.

There sat my teammates, all of them looking worriedly at me.

"Where am I?" I asked groggily

"In the schools infirmary" Jackal answered

"What happened?" I asked more to myself than them

"That's what we'd like to know" Marui said "Your homeroom teacher told us that you suddenly started laughing loudly and soon after you cried like a baby and then you fainted".

So that's what happened…embarrassing.

I sat up in the bed and massaged my face and winced when I reached my left cheek. It was still swollen and I was sure that I had a blue eye.

I gently massaged my cheek and shivered at the dull pain.

"Is there something bothering you, Akaya?" Yanagi asked worriedly

"No" I answered, trying to sound normal. "I just haven't gotten any sleep lately"

"And why is that?" Sanada said softly, obviously feeling guilty because he hit me.

"I'm having nightmares"

Nobody asked what I was having nightmares about.

They all knew. At that moment the school nurse interrupted us.

"You're awake? Good." She turned to the others.

"If you wouldn't mind, I'd like to talk to Kirihara-kun alone for a bit".

They left hesitantly and I turned to the nurse.

She coughed gently and sat down on a chair.

"We have all been informed about what happened to you some weeks ago" she started.

"I would like to know if your behaviour has anything to do with that".

"I'm fine" I lied

"No, you are not fine"

I was a little taken aback by her stern voice.

"I'm just having bad dreams," I muttered.

"Listen" the nurses voice was softer now "I now that your doctor recommended that you should visit a psychologist. After hearing about you, the principal decided that you should see one too".

"I don't need a stupid head shrink" I moaned childishly at her.

"Let me rephrase that last bit. If you don't go to a psychologist, you will get suspended".

"What" I croaked out.

"The principal and the teachers think of you as a possible threat to the students here. If you choose not to see one, we will suspend you for the rest of the year.

And that means no tennis either".

The nurse rose from the seat. "Think about it. You can go now" she said and left.

----

I opened the infirmary door and went out in the hallway, not really knowing where I went.

I found myself in the schoolyard, and decided to go home.

'No point in overstaying my welcome here' I thought bitterly.

"Akaya" I heard someone shout.

I turned to see the other's running towards me.

I continued to walk to the school gates, not really wanting to see them right now.

"Akaya, why are you going home? School's not over yet" Marui asked.

"It is for me," I snarled back at him.

"Watch your tongue" Niou snarled back.

I ignored him. I didn't even snarl at him.

"Listen" I said angrily. "The nurse told me that if I don't see a fucking psychologist, I'd get suspended for the rest of the year".

If I had been in a lighter mood, I might have laughed at their shocked faces.

"But why would they suspend you? Isn't that a little harsh?" Jackal said.

"Apparently I am a danger to the other students," I muttered.

Nobody said anything, and I felt the anger boil up again.

"I'm going" I said and started walking.

"Wait" Marui said and gripped my hand.

His hand was clutching mine hard. I shuddered as I remembered Sawada'sstrong hands holding mine as I helplessly tried to escape.

"DON'T TOUCH ME!" I shouted and shoved Sawada away.

I blinked when I recognized the person lying on the ground as Marui and not Sawada.

I looked at Marui's hurt eyes.

"I'm sorry" I mutterer weakly and ran away.

As I ran I heard someone shouting for me to come back, but I only ran faster.

I clutched my chest and breathed heavily.

Looking around I didn't recognize the place.

----

When I came home it was already dark.

"Where have you been?" I jumped when someone shouted.

"Mom?"

"Yes. I have been so worried for you".

I blinked surprised.

"Aren't you on a business trip?"

"I decided to end it early. I got the call from school" I could hear the nervousness in her voice.

Was she scared of me too?

"I have set up a meeting with Dr. Akiyama tomorrow. He is one of the best and will surely help you"

"But I don't need any help" I yelled angrily.

"Don't get so mad" she spoke softly to me. "I know I haven't been here for you, but that will change now. I have quit my job as a spokeswoman and started working as a secretary. So I won't leave you alone anymore"

"But you hate to work in offices" I mumbled weakly.

"You are more important to me than any kind of jobs" mom said and hugged me tightly.

"I will always be on your side," she whispered into my ear and I started to sob, hugging her back, not wanting to let go.

It's weird, you know? That every time a door is closed another one is opened.

I must admit that I was scared when Sawada forcefully shut the door to my childhood.

But standing here doing a simple thing as hugging my mom and crying my heart out, I couldn't help but see the slight crack in the door which led to happiness.

* * *

**I decided that I wanted to end this chapter like this. Poor Kirihara can't be sad or scared ALL the time. I'm starting to feel unoriginal.**

**He cries way too much for his own good**

**Please tell me what you think..!!!**


	7. Chapter 6

Sorry for the wait but my beta had sirup in her ass...and there was was some slight confusion regarding this chapter. It really is a quite long story.

The time is now 05:11 and my brain is malfunctioning --- _that _is a difficult word to write...

moving on...

**Important note: **I know it says in the last chapter that Dr.Akiyama is a 'he', but it was supposed to be 'she'.

And the voting had been decided. **MaruixKirihara** was the winner, though SanadaxKirihara was popular too. So I think I'll write some Sanada-Kirihara friendship stuff

**Disclaimer**: I do not own Prince of Tennis. I do, however, own Sawada...yeah, nuff said.

**Warnings**: Slight rubbish so please pardon the foolishness.

**Beta**: the ever-loving may-linn87...

Enjoy!!!

* * *

Dr.Akiyama looked at me through her round glasses.

"I see you finally decided to visit a therapist" she said and brushed her long black hair over her shoulder.

She was what could be called beautiful, but I was far too pissed to compliment her.

"I didn't choose, I was forced to" I muttered grumpily

"Explain" Dr.Akiyama asked shortly

"The principal told me that if I don't see a shrink, I would be suspended"

"Really" Dr.Akiyama breathed and wrote something down on a paper. "And how does that make you feel?"

"Bloody fantastic" I said sarcastically.

"Oh, so you don't like school? Were you bullied?"

I blinked stupidly. Did she not understand the sarcasm?

"No, I like school" I stumbled as I spoke.

"I see" was the only reply.

Geez, this woman had a dry humour.

"Anyways, let's get down to business" Dr.Akiyama spoke.

"You sure you're a shrink?" I mumbled weakly. What kind of talk was that?

"Of course I am. If you have a doubt, I can show you my diploma"

"No thank you"

Twitch…twitch.

She may be beautiful, but she's dry like the Sahara desert.

"I have been informed by Shigure-san about what happened. But today I only want to get to know you, so no talking about the incident".

I nodded a casual response.

"Do you have any phobias?" she asked

"Phobias? No, I don't think so" I answered truthfully.

"Are you popular at school?"

"No, not really"

"Do you have any friends at all?"

"Ey" I growled angrily at her. Of course I have friends, everyone has friends.

"Could you describe you closest friend or friends?"

"Sure…one is a bitchy man who loves his cap _way _too much and often hits me. One is a guy who looks like a girl. He's in hospital right now, waiting for an operation. Then there's a white haired dude who loves to pull pranks, especially on me. One guy talks to his golf clubs, one shouts _fire_ all the time and one runs around eating candy 24/7 without gaining any weight. And then it's BF who loves to write down every little secret in his notebook and then sit up all night making strategies how to defeat you".

Hmm…When I think about it, we Rikkaidai Regulars are a little odd.

Dr.Akiyama, at least, seemed slightly shocked.

"I…I see" she mumbled and began to write on the paper. "So...what kind of operation is this feminine guy having?" she asked nonchalantly.

I responded by raising by eye brow, ignoring the voice that told me Dr.Akiyama was perhaps misunderstnding something.

"You said that one is your BF. Do you mean Boyfriend?" she continued hen I didn't answer.

I widened my eyes and coughed loudly in surprise.

"No…I meant best friend, but I didn't want to sound all mushy!" I yelled at her.

Stupid, stupid woman. Now I'm never going to be able to look into Yanagi's eyes.

Not that that may actually be a problem, since Yanagi seldom opened his eyes.

"You have anything against homosexuals?"

I sighed in defeat. This woman is like a robot.

"I have only met one gay man, and he raped me, so I don't have much to compare with," I said, trying to act casually.

Before anything else could be said, or asked, a clock rang.

"It seems like our meeting is over for today. I will be expecting you same time on Friday".

I muttered a goodbye and hurriedly left.

----

I looked at the school gate and sighed. I really didn't want to meet my teammates after what happened the other day.

But I knew that I had to apologize, so I swallowed my pride and walked towards the tennis clubhouse.

I breathed deeply and opened the door and was met with silence.

Whatever conversation was being held stopped as soon as I entered.

"Um, hi" I mumbled.

Sanada looked at me and nodded a hello, but the others didn't say or do anything except to look at me.

It wasn't like seeing those stares was different, I've seen them in the eyes of many different people, but always shrugged it off.

But this time it was different. This time familiar eyes were looking at me with that stare.

The unemotional stare, like I meant nothing at all.

I've seen it before, as I am no popular person, and have never cared about what other think about me.

But I felt my insides turn to ice as their stares forced inside me and left me with a hollow feeling.

I felt my chest tighten in a pain I have never experienced before.

'They won't even listen' a voice spoke in my head.

I breathed hard and tried to relax.

"Never mind" I whispered and ran out of the clubhouse.

"WAIT!" someone shouted behind me, and seconds later I felt a hand grip my arm tightly.

I turned and saw Marui standing there, looking worried.

"I'm sorry about before". The words fell from my mouth before I could think.

Marui smiled a little. "Stupid, like that bothers me".

I smiled apologetically, but felt much better.

"What bothers me though, is the way you reacted" Niou shot out from behind Marui.

Everyone had come out of the clubhouse and was standing in a half circle.

"I-it's nothing" I stumbled out.

_They can't know about it…_

"It's not nothing," Sanada said. "If everything is fine, why did you push Marui away?"

"I agree with Sanada" Yanagi entered. "And considering what you were saying, it must have something to do with _that"._

We all knew what _that_ was. The _incident_.

I felt fear rise through my body as I saw them looking questioningly at me.

_If they find out…_

"Don't worry, I'll be fine" I said and smiled to prove it.

"We know you too good to fall for that trick" Niou snickered.

Well, it was worth a try.

"Then, what do you want me to say?" I asked, looking at them.

They went silent at my question, and I could see that they were trying to think of something.

"Listen, I'll be fine, eventually" I lied.

_You know what will happen if they find out…_

"Of course you'll be" Marui laughed. "You always pull through, no matter what difficulties you face"

"Meh, how melodramatic we are today" I joked, but deep inside I felt the ice melt.

"Well, now that that's settled, it's time for practice" Sanada ordered and everyone wakled towards the courts.

"Hey, Marui" I said quietly and tugged slightly at his arm

"What is it?" Marui asked

"Thank you" I whispered almost inaudibly

Marui's face instantly flushed and I couldn't help but laugh.

"I'm glad to know that I can affect you like this" I said without thinking.

'Wait, why did I say that?' I thought suddenly.

Marui blinked surprised and looked right into my eyes.

I felt my own face redden and tried to look at anything else.

'He's going to think that I-'

"Do you mean that?" I heard him ask me and turned around surprised.

His face was still flushed, but he didn't look so embarrassed anymore. In his eyes burned something I couldn't recognize, but it looked a lot like hope.

I swallowed hard and found it hard to speak.

"Do you mean that?" Marui asked again, a little more forceful this time.

"Yes" I croaked out before I could think.

But I meant it.

"Hey you two, practice started 5 minutes ago. 10 rounds around the courts" Sanada yelled and interrupted our conversation.

"Yes" I yelled back and started running.

Maybe if I run fast enough I can run from away from my embarrassment.

"Na, Akaya"

Apparently not

"Yes?"

"Are you doing something tomorrow?"

I slowed down my pace so Marui could catch up.

"No"

"Then, how about we hang out?"

I almost tripped over a rock and praised God I didn't, because that would've been totally uncool.

"Ah, but tomorrow is a Thursday. We have school the day after".

"Since when did you care about school?" Marui pouted.

"Since when did you become so shrewd" I joked.

"Idiot, you don't even know what shrewd means".

"Ah, shut up" I muttered, faking irritancy.

"Don't speak to your senpai like that. And now you have to come with me"

Yes, very senpai like, I know.

"Sure I'll come" I said and pretended I didn't see Marui blush.

Really, it's amazing that he hadn't fainted yet, considering the amount of blood that had flushed to his head today.

"Let's race" I yelled and sped up.

"Mou, you cheated" I heard Marui shriek behind me.

This is good. This is safe. Pretend to be fine, so they won't become suspicious. Because they can never know.

It will forever stay as my secret.

My dirty secret.

* * *

So that was that...I'm going to bed now..night! 


	8. Chapter 7

Here I am with another chapter. AND...review nr** 50 **was just put up I am SO happy. Therefore this chapter is dedicated to **merissala**. I promised **merissala** to dedicate chapter 6 to her (but I was so tired that I forgot...sorry) so I'll dedicate this chapter instead. D

**Disclaimer**: I do not own Prince of Tennis and this time I do **NOT** own Sawada. I gave him away. wanna know more about it, read the next chapter.

**Warnings**: This chapter was painful to write...So there's angst, yeah!!!!

Enjoy

* * *

"Really, senpai, you think its ok to of out like this on a weekday?"

"S'ok Akaya. And you can call me Bunta"

"You really are drunk, aren't you?" I mused

We were sitting in a secluded place in a little shady restaurant that Marui somehow knew of.

"I am so not drunk" Marui bawled and reached out for the sake bottle.

"I think you've had enough" I said and snatched it from him.

"Tsk, you're so boring. And I told you to call me Bunta".

I chuckled and took a long drag from the bottle.

"Come on, say it" Marui repeated and stared at me intently.

I felt my already red cheeks redden even more.

"Bunta…san" I mumbled embarrassed.

"That's my boy. Now give me my sake".

"I think we should go home now. It's already 01.30 in the morning".

"I guess you're right" Marui agreed and got up from the chair. I did the same and almost fell over the table. I guess I'm more drunk than I thought I was.

Since there was no chance in Hell that I'd be allowed to stay out this late on a weekday, I had told my mom that I would be sleeping at Marui's place, since his parents were out of town.

How we made it there is still a mystery to me, because suddenly we were at his house.

"You live here?" I asked when I saw his house. It was quite large.

"Yes, it's nice isn't it" Marui said and fumbled for the house keys.

"I didn't get to fix a futon for you, so we must share the bed" he said as we entered the house.

Marui's face was red as he said it, but I think it had to be the sake.

"It's ok, I can take the sofa" I mumbled a little embarrassed.

"Don't be stupid, you're a guest" Marui demanded and pushed me towards his room.

As soon as he closed the door, he started stripping of his clothes.

I quickly turned against the wall and hid my embarrassment.

"I didn't bring a pyjama" I muttered out.

Marui chuckled behind me. "S'ok, you can sleep in your boxers".

I was about to protest, but shut my mouth when I felt his hand on my shoulder.

"You don't mind that, do you?" he said, and I turned around surprised.

His voice sounded so…scared, but also hopeful.

"No…No I don't mind that".

"Good" Marui smiled and dragged me to the bed.

He jumped in first and shuffled to the side, making room for me.

I hesitantly lay down and pulled the covers over me. They smelled like Marui.

"I'm sorry if it's cramped" he said beside me. I could feel his breath on my bare skin and shivered involuntarily.

"I'll be fine" I stuttered dumbly.

"Good night"

"Night"

----

The day after was a bitch. I woke up with an excruciating headache and my body was laying almost outside the bed.

'Where am I?' I thought as I tried to gather my thoughts.

Suddenly something moaned beside me and something rolled over me.

'Oh, that's right. I'm sleeping at Marui's place, and the thing laying over me is Marui'

…

Wait a minute…

My cheeks reddened when the realization hit me.

Marui was only wearing a boxer.

I looked down to see his face only centimetres from mine.

My heartbeat quickened.

Oh, what to do, what to do…

I gently tried to push him away, and after a little while, Marui rolled to the other side.

I sighed and tried to find my clothes in the little light from the sunrise.

When I was dressed I checked the time. It showed 04.30.

'So I really didn't get much sleep' my brain, yes my brain, said.

I staggered to the door and quietly slid outside.

The alcohol wasn't quite out of my system yet, so I often tripped over things on my way home.

Oh, why did I agree to do this?

_Because __he__ asked you, right…_

Stupid brain for always knowing what's going on in my head.

----

"Akaya, pay attention when I'm speaking to you"

"I wasn't sleeping" I yelled and looked around confused.

Sanada sighed and walked towards me.

"Are you feeling ok? You look a little pale"

I laughed nervously "Of course I'm fine. I just didn't get much sleep last night"

"Oh, you were accompanying someone?" Niou teased.

I tensed, but tried to act normal.

"What makes you say that?" I challenged him, but stiffened when I saw a smirk widen on Niou's face.

"That does" he said and pointed at my neck.

"What does?" I asked confused.

"You got a hickey there. And it's quite big too" he laughed.

"A what?" I choked out.

"Let me see" Sanada demanded and tucked at my neck a little.

His eyes widened and he stared at me disbelievingly.

"Akaya, what exactly were you doing last night?" he roared.

I didn't answer him, but ran towards the mirror.

And there it was a bright red hickey with the size of the moon on my lower neck.

'How the Hell did this get there' I thought desperately.

I turned to look at Marui, but he had lowered his head shamefully.

I understood who had done it then.

"Marui, I need to talk to you" I said angrily and I dragged him out of the club house and towards the outer part of the tennis courts.

"What id the meaning of this?" I yelled at him.

Marui flinched and bowed his head.

"I'm sorry" he mumbled.

"Sorry isn't enough" I bit out. "When did you do it?"

"When you had fallen asleep, I…" Marui flicked a hair strand between his fingers nervously

"Why?" I asked, more calm now.

"Are you really that dense?" he suddenly yelled at me.

I jumped at his sudden outburst.

"What do you mean?" I asked sheepishly

"Really, you're too much" Marui said with a sad face.

"What is wrong with you" I snapped at him, feeling confused, which again made me angry.

"Lately you've been acting weird".

"So I'm weird, huh"

We were both quiet for while, neither looking at the other.

"I like you" Marui suddenly said.

I turned to look at him and saw him staring straight into my eyes.

"Y-you what?" I stuttered.

"I like you, really like you. Actually I love you"

My body felt numb and my voice disappeared. He likes me?

"I have…for such a long time now…always been thinking only about you, but…" Marui sniffed and I saw a few tears trail down his cheek.

"But you never noticed anything…and when I found out that you already had a boyfriend, I thought I should give up, but…but I couldn't because you mean too much for me".

Marui choked on the last word and started shaking.

_Say something_

"I…I"

_Anything_

"Sorry"

Marui wiped away his tears and looked at me sadly.

"I never noticed that you felt so strongly for me" I muttered dumbly.

"And what do you feel about me?" Marui asked quietly, almost as if he dreaded the answer.

'What _do_ I feel?' I thought desperately. I had never really thought of him that way, but…

_Sawada…_

Of course…it's only stupid for me to be in love with someone. Because I'm dirty and Marui deserves much better.

"The only thing I feel for you now is disgust"

I could see how much my words hurt him as he fell to the ground.

I had to braze myself to not quiver.

'Make him hate you so much that he'll never want to see you again. That's the only way to keep him safe'.

"Really senpai, I never knew that you were a fag" I spat at him.

"Why do you say that" a tear stricken Marui whispered to me.

"I'm not a fag. That guy you met was just an idiot friend of mine" I ranted on.

"Why are you so mean?" he whimpered and a new wave of tears flooded down his face.

"Don't think I'll sympathize with you just because you cry. If anything it only sickens me more".

Marui didn't say anything else, but started crying violently.

"Was there anything else?" I asked sternly but didn't get an answer.

"Well, I'll leave you alone then" I said and hastily turned around ignoring the faint call from my crying friend.

"Akaya…"

I ran to the club house and grabbed my bag.

"Where are you going?" Sanada demanded, but I rushed past him.

"I have a hangover, so I'm going home" I yelled back towards him and kept running.

'I have to get home now' I thought and sprinted the whole way home.

As soon as I was there, I dashed to my room and crashed down in the bed.

There I finally let my mask fall and cried hard.

I curled up in bed as I tried to hide from the pain.

My chest hurt and I had this big lump in my throat.

'This is for the best. This way I'll keep him safe' I tried to comfort myself, but it didn't work.

Because he'll never know that, he will never know that I did it for him. I will only be the cold bastard who rejected him in an inhumane way.

It's better if I'm the only one suffering.

I grabbed my pillow and shrieked loud into it several times.

Why does it always have to be like this? Why can't I be happy too?

_Sawada_

I breathed deep and tried to calm myself. In the end crying never solved anything. It only gave you a sore throat and a puffed face.

I needed to feel pain, physical pain, and that right now.

I picked up my cell phone and dialled his number.

"My my, and what an honour to have you call me, kitten" a drawled voice said.

"Are you free?" I asked coldly.

"You don't beat around the bush do you" Sawada said and laughed

"Are you free?" I repeated.

"I'm always free for you. Come to my apartment"

"Yes" I mumbled and ended the call.

'Nobody hurts me more than you do' I thought and walked out the door.

* * *

** Cliffy...So I hope you liked this chapter. Please tell me your thoughts...**


	9. Chapter 8

This is the whole chapter 8. I've been extremely busy, and had no time whatsoever to sit down and write. I have, however had time to think where this story should go, and I've concluded that it'll be about 2-3 more chapters before it's done.

**Disclaimer**: I do not own Prince of Tennis

**Warnings**: plenty of spelling mistakes...sorry...wanna be my beta?

* * *

I shuddered as Sawada slowly licked his way from my ear to the back og my neck.

"You taste good as usual" he taunted, continuing his ministrations.

I held back the nausea, knewing I had chosen this myself.

"Though I was surprised when you called me. Never knew I already had broken you".

Sawada chuckled before continuing lower.

My body shivered in anticipation.

When did I become like this?

----

I lay on his bed, utterly spent. My sore body only making me feel more alive.

"Something happen?" Sawada asked. He was mostly dressed already.

"Nothing really" I muttered.

Sawada grabbed my chin and forced me to look in his eyes.

"I asked you if something happened" he bit out harshly.

"And I told you it's nothing" I snarled back. I slapped his hand away.

"You think you've broken me, but you couldn't be further from the truth. I will _never _become yours".

As I spoke I saw something flare up in Sawada's eyes, and before I knew it he had twisted me around, so I was lying on my stomach.

"What are you doing?" I croaked out. I couldn't move, because Sawada had twisted my are behind my back.

I heard Sawada chuckle and felt fear shoot my body. I knew that laugh, and it didn't bring happiness.

I tried to see what he was doing, but my sight was limited.

Suddenly I felt pain shoot through my back.

I gasped as a warm feeling spread down my spine.

"What the-?"

"I'm punishing you, kitten" Sawada laughed evilly. I heard something rustle behind me, and forced my head to turn.

He was holding his brown leather belt.

Realization hit me, and I tried to wriggle out of his grip.

"Stop…Don't" I pleaded.

"Littke kittens must know their place"

Another hit made me gasp out loud, tears brimming in my eyes.

"It hurts"

"Relax kitten, we're not finished yet".

And the hits continued until both my back and throat was sore.

"Good kitten, making all those screams" Sawada licked my lips before claiming them in a kiss.

I was motionless on the bed, every movement hurting like hell.

Practice was gonna be a bitch tomorrow.

----

Of course it had to be a hot day.

I cursed and pulled annoyed at my regulars jacket.

But I had to wear it.

When I checked my back this morning, I almost fainted. It was red and swolled, and some places even had blood stains. I had carefully clothed myself, but quickly realized that you could see the bruises. So I had to wear the jacked too.

I wiped the sweat from my forehead before continuing my laps.

What I _really _didn't need now, saw an agrivated Sanada.

"Yo, brat. You ok?" Niou said suddenly appearing out of nowhere, and gave me a friendly pat on my back.

I winced and hastily pulled away.

"What? I didn't even hit you hard" Niou said surprised.

"I'm ok, Niou-senpai. It's just a bit warm" I assured.

"And no wonder you're hot. Why the hell would you wear the jacket on such a warm day?"

"Kirihara, Niou, this is tennis practice, not some sewing club" Sanada shouted at us.

'Saved by the bell' I thought relieved before running of.

10 minutes later I was feeling like hell. My body was bathing in sweath and I was having difficulties breathing.

"Kirihara, if you're not going to practice, you can leave" Sanada scolded.

I rubbed my eyes, not being able to see clearly.

"Did you hear me?"

"Yeah" I mumbled and fainted.

----

When I woke up, I found myself in the nurses office. I looked around to find an annoyed Sanada sitting in a chair by my bed.

"How sweet" I joked and laughed.

"There is nothing to laugh about" Sanada fumed. "I have been spending too much time, sitting in the nurses office waiting four you to wake up".

"Yeah, I have been here a few times lately".

The nurse popped her head from behind the curtains.

"You're awake? Great. Now, I have a few questions for you".

She entered and closed the curtains behind her.

"You can stay Sanada-kun" she said as Sanada got up to leave.

"First I want to ask you, if anything is OK at home"

"Yeah, everything's fine. Why?"

"Just a question. I've heard that you had a little situation with a guy not long ago. Is that correct?"

There was that stupid word again. Situation.

"Yeah" I muttered.

"Is he still bothering you?"

That question, I was not

"N-no, of course not" I lied.

"Then, can you please explain those bruises on your back?"

The nurse pierced me with her eyes, and I quickly looked away.

"Bruises?" Sanada asked shocked. "What bruises?"

"Kirihara-kun. I want you to take off your shirt and show us your back".

I unconciously clutched my shirt and leaned back in the bed.

"I'm not undressing in front of you" I shouted at her.

"Why? Is there something you hide?" the nurse asked.

I looked at Sanada for support, but he only stared blankly back.

"Do as she says" he said strictly.

I breathed out and slowly removed my shirt. So today was the day they found out? I guess I knew it would happen sooner or later…I just wish it was later. Much later.

"My God" I heard Sanada mutter as he saw my back.

"Who did this to you?" he roared.

"I-"

I couldn't say it.

"Speak" Sanada snarled and grabbed my shoulders.

"Sanada-kun" the nurse tried, but Sanada ignored her.

"Speak" he shouted at me.

"I'm sorry" I whispered back. I could feel the tears stream down my cheeks, many tears.

"I'm sorry".

My voice broke as I started sobbing voilently.

Sanada was just standing there, not really knowing what to do. Then he clumsily lay his hands around my shoulders and gave me an awkward hug.

I didn't care, and pressed against him, needing all the comfort I could get right now.

The nurse had gone, probably to call my mom.

"I'm sorry I yelled at you" Sanada mumbled.

"Dude, what's going on?" I heard Niou's voice shout.

I looked up and saw the rest of the team standing there.

"What are you guys doing here?" Sanada asked.

"Practice is over, so we thought we'd stop by" Jackal said.

"But-What the hell" Yanagi suddenly bursted.

He ran over to me and looked at my back.

"What is this?" he asked.

The other regulars became curious and looked too.

"Shit"

"That's serious"

"Who did this?"

"Was it Sawada?" Marui asked me.

I didn't reply, but hid my face in Sanada's shoulder.

"Sawada? As in that bastard who raped him?" Niou asked shocked.

"Yeah" Marui said. "Akaya, look at me" he demanded.

I was surprised by him saying my name like that and turned to look at him.

"It was him, wasn't it?" Marui looked straight in my eyes, demanding an answer.

"Yes" I whispered.

"WHAT?" the other's exclaimed.

"When? How? WHY?"

"I..I"

I tried to speak, but the words wouldn't come out.

"Has he been harassing you all the time?" Yanagi asked.

"Yes" I sobbed quietly.

"Then why didn't you tell us?" Sanada roared again.

"Because he said he would harm you if I did"

"Don't be an idiot" Niou snarled. "You think we can't handle our own problems?"

"But…Yukimura" I said desperately.

"What about him?"

"Sawada's father owns half of the god damn city. And he owns the hospital where Yukimura is. It was him who broke in at night. He said that next time, he wouldn't get caught".

I sobbed again as I spoke, squeezing my hands against my chest.

"He said that if I ever told you anything, he would og there again, and that time he wouldn't get caught. You know what that means right. What he wouldv'e done to Yukimura. I couldn't stand it if that happened to him.

The others went quiet, looking at each other questioningly.

"He beat you up too?" Yagyuu asked.

"Yes"

"So…he's done _that_ to you several times too?"

"…Yes"

There was some shocked noises, and I hid my face, feeling embarrassed.

"We must do something" Jackal said.

"Yeah, but what?" Yanagi said, thinking hard.

"Anything-"

The nurse interrupted the soon-to-be quarrel.

"Kirihara-kun, your mother is here" she announced, and seconds later mom stormed through the door.

"Akaya, how are you?" she cried before running to my side. "I knew something was wrong, oh, I should have said something before. I am such a bad mother" she bawled.

"I've decided" she suddenly said determined.

"You decided what?"

"This is going too far. We can't live like this anymore".

I felt slightly uneasy as she spoke. "Mom, what are you planning"

"We're moving, Akaya. I've already spoke to my boss and he said I could get transferred wherever I want to. We're leaving in a week".

* * *

Exciting...or, something :P **Stay tune (tune I say...geh) for the next chapter, where the big climax will be (no, not a lemon).**

Later...


	10. Chapter 9

And we're finally here. Only one more chapter to go. I also want to remind you to read the complete chapter 9, if anyone haven't done that. If you don't, you'll miss a lot of info.

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Prince of Tennis. I do however own Sawada, which entitles me to do whatever I want to do with his...fufufu.

**Warnings:** Violence and character death.

Enjoy

* * *

I sat in my room, thinking. Though, please don't take me for a filosopher, because I don't think about stupid things like, why are we here? Why do I live?

Go figure.

I wanted to lay down in my bed, but I knew that however I lay, my back was going to kill me.

_'Moving in a week…Maybe it isn't such a bad idea'_

I sighed and continued thinking.

I distantly heard the dor bell ring, but didn't care. I had told mom that I didn't want to see anyone today.

So I continued with the thinking stuff…until someone knocked on my door.

"Whaaat?" I drawled lazily.

"I'm coming in" a man's voice said.

The door opened, and there stood Marui.

"Senpai" I said surprised. "What-" before I could finish the sentence, Marui had thrown himself around me, hugging me tightly.

_'__What?' _

"S-senpai" I croaked out.

"Don't" Marui's ruffled voice said.

"Don't what?"

"Just…let me stay like this. Just for a little while".

I stared disbelievingly at him, but didn't push him away. I'm not _that_ heartless.

After a while Marui finally let go. He sighed and looked at me.

"You're moving" he stated.

"Um…yeah"

"Please, don't go" he cried and bent his head.

Lost for words I did the only thing I could do. I petted his head.

_'Yeah, that's really gonna help him. You're such a tard'_

You know that voice in your head? If someone says that you should listen to it, punch them.

"You're just running away, like a coward" he sobbed quietly.

"What do you mean?"

He lifted his head and looked angrily at me.

"Moving is just another way of running" he snarled.

"Calm down" I shouted, starting to feel irritated.

I didn't ask for this to happen, so why the hell did he behave like this?

"I won't calm down" he shouted back. "Since no one else is saying it, I have to do it. Because I love you."

I gasped shocked at his statement.

"Why do you look so surprised. I've told you before, haven't I" Marui muttered. He wiped away the tears on his cheeks, but more came.

He cursed and slapped his cheeks.

"You running away won't solve anything. That idiot must be punished for his crimes. You can't let him run off free".

"I have already told you my reasons. Just accept them and leave me the _fuck_ alone" I screamed at him.

Marui winced and took a step back.

"I see" he said. "You're one of _those_. One who gives up before he tries. You're the worst".

And with that he stormed out of my room, slamming the door after him.

I sighed and sat back down on the bed.

Maybe he was right. Maybe I was running. But what was I supposed to do?

My thoughts were interrupted when my cell phone buzzed, signalizing the income of a message.

'_Who could it be?' _I thought lazily, flipping the cell open. And felt a sinking feeling in my stomach.

**Tonight at 8. Storage**

I somehow knew that that 'storage' was where he first raped me. I shuddered as I though about it. Looking at the clock, I realized that I had only one hour until the meeting time.

_'I wonder why he wants to meet me at the storage?'_

----

I beliberately walked slowly towards the storage. As I came closer and closer, I was getting more and more scared.

Today was the last time. But…would Sawada continue when he was gone? Was I just the first of many?

The thought scared me, and I suddenly knew that I had to end this. I clenched my fists and entered the storage.

Seeing the bed where it happened, oh so long ago, I felt sick.

"Hello, kitten" a voice said from the darkness.

Flipping the light on, I saw Sawada standing in the back of the storage, looking at me.

"I heard a little rumour that you were moving" he snickered.

My heard skipped a beat, and I looked shocked at him.

"How..?"

"I have my sources" he said and started walking towards me.

"I never knew that you didn't like me that much, though. Makes me feel kinda…unloved". He put his right hand in his pocket and smirked. Suddenly he lurched forward. I faintly saw something silver before I felt pain shoot through my arm.

I screamed and fell on my knees, clutching my left shoulder. I felt somehting wet on my fingers and looked at them.

Blood.

The bastard had a fucking knife.

"Wait" I shouted, but he only smiled.

"Like I'd let you go, kitten" he smiled, his eyes reflecting the madness in his head.

He looked at the knife before eyeing me again.

"Scream louder" he said, before lunging forward again.

I threw myself to the left, trying to escape, but was a little too late.

The knife cut me deep on the shoulderblade, and a lot of blood gushed out.

"My, my, how lucky you are. That one was very close your neck" Sawada laughed.

The pain was excrutiating, but I had no time to think about it.

Thinking quickly, I turned the switch of, and the storage went dark. Taking the opportunity, I dashed towards the end of the room, hiding behind some large boxes.

Knowing it wouldn't be long before he found me, I quickly opened my cell and called someone I knew would come.

"Hallo?"

"Yanagi, it's me"

"Akaya? You seldom call me. Is there something you need?"

"Help me" I whispered.

There was a pause in the other end, before Yanagi's alarmed voice reappeared.

"Where are you?"

"I'm in the storage where you last found me. He has a knife".

With that I hung up, and tried to breathe as quiet as I could.

Minutes passed as Sawada roamed around the dark room, occasionally bumping into things.

Why he hadn't switched on the lights yet, was beyond me, but I didn't complain. The storage wasn't really that big, and he would've found me right away if the lights were on.

I carefully looked up from behind a box, and tried to see if I could spot Sawada. But he wasn't there.

I started to wonder if he had given up and left when I heard a little sound…right behind me.

"Found you" Sawada whispered in my ear. I jumped and looked terrified at him.

"I'm sorry, but I have to kill you now" Sawada said a matter-of-factly.

"We have decided that before you leave, I will kill you.

_'We? Man, he really is crazy'._

I ran from the boxes, but my head felt so light, and I stumbled and fell hard.

As I lay on the floor I could practically feel the blood running out of me, and my conscience with it.

Sawada walked slowly towards me, laughed hysterically.

"Let's meet again in hell, kitten" he said before lifting the knife.

I watched as the knife descended in a slow motion, and knew this was it. I closed my eyes, and waited for the impact, but it never came.

When I opened my eyes, the lights were on. Confused I looked at the door, to find Yanagi standing there.

Seconds later three policemen came running in, pointing their guns at Sawada.

"Drop the knife" one said.

Sawada laughed again and then looked at me.

"I guess I'll be going first" he said. He then pointed the knife at me, and..

PANG

My breath hitched as Sawada fell dead to the floor, still holding the knife.

I looked at his face which was contorted in a horrible grimace.

Someone lay a soft hand over my eyes. "It's over now" I heard Yukimura's voice say.

"Are you harmed?" a police officer asked.

I nodded absentminded and pointed at my arm and shoulder.

They then transported me to a police car and looked at my wounds.

"So..that was Sawada" I heard Jackal distantly say.

"Reqesting immediately ambulanse…"

The words drowned into a mess of noise and the next I remember was a white room.

And that goddamn familiar roof.

_'I guess I'm in the hospital'_

Looking around I saw that I was not alone. Mom was sleeping in a chair beside my bed.

"Mom" my voice rasped as I spoke, but she woke immediately.

"Oh, my dear baby" she cried and clutched my hand.

"How are you?"

"I'm a little groggy" I answered.

"It's the painkillers" she smiled.

"Hey, I know you're tired, but I wan't to ask you something.

"What?"

Mom hesitated a little before continuing.

"I've gotten a great work offer. It's much better paid, I don't have to travel much and I don't work late in the evenings."

"Sounds like a great job mom" I smiled.

"It's only..we have to move".

"I guess that's all right. I never really liked the house we're living in now anways..So where are we moving?"

"England."

"What?" I exclaimed. "England? That's fricking far away".

"I know, but I think it will be a big help for us both. England has one of the world's best nature, and I have already talked to a therapist who is interested in you".

I nodded and sighed.

"Where in England?"

"I think that right now, you shouldn't have much around you, so we're moving north in England. On a farm."

"Cool" I laughed. "Can we have animals?"

Mom laughed too them.

"Silly, it's not a functioning farm. But it's big and the local people are nice. I know you might have troubles understanding in the beginning, but you'll learn. So…what do you think?"

I could see that this was something mom really wanted, but again I hindered her. First I made her quit her job, and now I'm hindering her in moving.

"I think it's a good idea" I said. And I meant it. Moving to another country may help a lot.

Anyways, I've always wanted to see England.

"Are you sure? What about your friends?"

"They'll manage" I joked.

"Anyways, England has Wimbledon right. I think I'll learn a lot if I og there".

Mom smiled when she realized that I wasn't lying.

"Then it's decided. And I think you're being really brave, honey".

"Mooom" I pouted.

"Fine, fine" she laughed. "I just wanted you to know. I'm going to phone my boss and let her know that I'm going to accept the offer."

And then she left the room.

I returned to looking at the roof.

_'England…sounds fun'_

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**Please review..I love reviews **

**One more chapter to go...How will it end? O.o**


	11. Chapter 10

So, this is the last chapter. I'll take the opportunity to thank everyone who's read and reviewed this story. You guys make my day.

I also have a fun (or hopefully good) news, but I will post that news on the end of this page

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Prince of Tennis.

Enjoy!!!

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Packing is a bitch, I've concluded. I didn't think I owned so many stuff. And I actually found an old gum behind my desk. 

It was disgusting.

Putting the last thinkg in the box, I carried out and put it in the moving truck.

The truck would transport our things to England by boat, and was therefore leaving two days before us.

We didn't bring out furnitures, because we got those free when we moved.

Cool, right?

I walked back in the house and sighed. It was very empty.

I went into my room and closed the door. The sound echoed through the house. A hollow sound.

I looked at my room. Except for the bed, desk and closet, it was empty.

_'I guess this is no lenger my room'._

Laying down on the bed, I tried to get some sleep. A picture of a bloody body flashed through my mind, and I opened my eyes.

I hadn't been able to sleep at all since the storage incident.

See, now even I have started saying things like; incident and situation.

It's contagious.

I also had packed down my tennis stuff, so I couldn't go out an play.

I thought two days would be forever, but I was wrong. They passed in no time.

And now it was time for leaving.

I pushed my bag with clothed into the backseat of the car.

"Akaya".

I jumped and quickly turned around. There stood everyone from the Rikkaidai regulars tennis team.

"Guys" I said awestruck.

"You didn't think we wouldn't come and say goodbye?" Yukimura smiled sadly.

"Buchou. Are you alright being out of the hospital?"

"Idiot" Sanada said. "He's been out of the hospital for a while now".

I frowned slightly. I must have overheard it.

Yukimura smiled and hugged me slightly.

"I'm going to miss you" he whispered softly.

"Yeah, but I'll write" I reassured.

"No, you won't " Niou said sarcastically.

I flipped him the bird, earning a slight scolding look from Yukimura.

"I'm sure that Akaya won't forget to contact us" Yanagi said.

"I won't" I smiled.

"Akaya, are you ready?" mom said as she closed the front door.

"Oh, hello" she said as she noticed the others.

"Hello" thay said back, bowing.

"Thank you for taking care of my son up until now" mom said and bowed slightly back.

She motioned to the car and got in.

I looked at the regulars, knewing I wouldn't see them anytime soon.

"Well…" I stottered. "I-I'm not really that good with goodbyes".

The other laughed.

"Neither are we".

"Well, then" I waved slightly before going to the car.

I looked at the gang and saw that one was missing.

"Where is Marui?"

The others immediately rubbing the back of their heads.

"I-I think he's…sick today" Jackal stottered.

Obviously a lie.

"Oh, well. Say goodbye to him for me" I smiled.

But inside I was fuming. He could at least say goodbye. And I who wanted to say something to him…

There was a short farewell/hugging sequence going on. Even Niou laid off his sarcastic remarks and hugged me lightly.

I waved before getting in the car.

"You ready?" mom asked.

"As ready as i'll ever get"

And then we drove off.

----

_"Flight 890 to Norfolk is starting its boarding. Passagers please head to gate 13". _(A/N: I really don't know what they say in england (or Japan) so please let it go, if it's very wrong..hehe)_  
_

We stormed through the airport to gate 13. Of course there was traffic on the way here, so we were running late.

We reached the gate and I slumped down in a chair. luckily there were many people going to Norfolk, so I could take a rest.

"Akaya".

I looked up when someone mentioned my name, and gaped.

"Marui".

I got up from the chair and looked at him.

"I thought you were sick"

Marui laughed. "It was lame, I know. Not coming to say goodbye".

"So you came all the way here to say goodbye instead?" I joked.

"Yes" Marui smiled sadly.

"I don't want to end it like this".

"End it?" what was he talking about?

"You're leaving forever right? But I still love you".

"S-senpai" I stottered.

"I know I'm bothering you, but…I can't help but feel this way".

He smiled earnestly then before hugging me tightly.

"Promise to come visit?"

I hugged him back, and laughed.

"Perhaps. It's a long way from Japan to England".

Then I leaned in and kissed him.

Marui's eyes widened with shock.

"W-what?" he stottered as we broke apart.

"I love you. Goodbye" I whispered in his ear before leaning in for another kiss.

This time when he broke apart, I left for the check-in desk. Showing them my passport and ticket, I quickly left for the plane.

I didn't look back once, because I knew that if I did, I would've run back to him.

It's really stupid, right. That you don't know what you got before it's gone.

I sighed and sat down beside mom.

"You all right, honey?" she asked worriedly.

"I'm fine. Just a little sad".

"Sad that it's over?"

_Over, heh…It never really started._

The plane took off and I looked out the window until I could no longer see Japan.

_I guess this is the end__…_

…But then again, the end is just the beginning of something new.

The End

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**But there'll be more. Yes, I've actually been thinking about a sequel. It'll take place two years after this story, and will be about Akaya coming back to Japan. And he has someone with him...O.o**

**Yes, that was the surprise...good? bad?..I don't care, cause I'll post it anyways..But you may have to wait for a little while, because I have to finish my other fic before I start with the sequel.**

**Again, thank you for reading and reviewing this story. I have greatly appreciated all of your comments.**

**Later...**


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